Something like Magic
by alfiejones
Summary: USUK circus AU. Alfred F. Jones is the star magician at Bonnefoy Brother's Circus, there's just one problem. He can't do a magic trick to save his life. Luckily his sarcastic, protective assistant Arthur is the one pulling the strings, unbeknownst to everyone. He just has to try and keep it a secret, but things are getting complicated as they start to fall in love.
1. Chapter 1

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, people of all ages, bienvenue." The velvet voice seeped through the darkness, a spotlight dripped down to the center of the ring, revealing the thickly-accented voice to belong to a handsome man with long golden hair and a dangerous expression. "to the most spectacular show you'll ever see. Welcome, to the Bonnefoy brother's circus! And up first, the incredible, the astounding..."

"Hey Arthur!"

"Quiet Alfred, there's a show going on you idiot!"

"I'm being quiet!" Arthur sighed, the bloody American probably thought he was. "Just, do you think anyone's ever realized that there's only one Bonnefoy?"

"Ah yes, the greatest show on Earth, strung together by good luck, good money, and good looks." Arthur rolled his eyes in the darkness.

"Well, I think that we're really good! At least, Ludwig and the Vargas brothers are. And Kiku and Antonio, I think Gilbert might kill someone pretty soon. Actually I think we're all really good, except for like, Ivan."

"And what did you say about me? Hmm?"

Arthur watched all the color drain from the boy's face beside him as the cheery Russian man materialized from the darkness.

"I-Ivan! Hi! I didn't see you there! Ahaha. ha." Alfred laughed nervously, hoping Ivan would just pass by, he dropped a heavy hand onto Alfred's shoulder, smiling down at him.

"I just wanted to know whether I should be flattered by what you were saying about me, or if I should be angry at you"

"Well I Was just talking about how, um, ah, you aren't good, I mean, you're not just good! You're great!"

"Hm, glad to know you feel that way. I'll see you soon, da? But first you have to go on. Byebye now!" Ivan waved, and the blonde duo breathed an audible sigh of relief as he stalked his way down outside the tent.

"Who the fuck thought it was a good idea for him to be a clown?" Arthur felt his friend's warm whisper in his ear.

Damn that Alfred Jones. He could talk his way out of anything and make Arthur swoon in a heartbeat. God, he wished he could be loved by Alfred F. Jones. But how could he, when he was just the assistant, the sideshow, the shadow, onstage and in life. He was just the plain counterpart to this absolutely magnetic boy with the million dollar smile, the one that thousands of people across the country fell in love with, while Arthur, always at his side, went almost completely unnoticed.

But for his purposes, that was probably for the best.

"And now, madames et monsieurs, filles et garcons, prepares yourselves…"

Alfred grinned down at Arthur, grabbing his hand and causing the butterflies in his stomach to rise from more than just stage fright.

"The incredible, the mysterious MR. JONES!"

Arthur took three long strides behind Alfred into the light, eyes adjusting to the bright lights and the roar of the crowd. Alfred threw his arms up in the air and taken a bow, his black suit fitting him, Arthur noted every show, incredibly well. The top hat perched on top of his head failed to cover his untamable cowlick, and he had taken his glasses off for the show, his blue eyes catching the light, and though Arthur knew that he probably couldn't see more than 5 feet ahead of him, Alfred looked beautiful.

He didn't blame the audience for falling for him.

"Thank you! Thank you!" Alfred waved at the crowd. "And I would like to introduce my lovely assistant Arthur!" On cue, Arthur stepped up to join Alfred in the center of the main ring.

Their magician act had always been incredibly popular, and they continued the night with the standard tricks before Alfred shot Arthur a nervous look, signaling he was about to announce the act he'd worried about for so long.

"And for our final trick tonight, we're going to save my assistant from mortal peril!"

The "moral peril" in question was rolled out into the ring in the form of a box, which Arthur opened with a wide stage smile to reveal the inside was lined with rusty metal spikes.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Alfred begin to sweat nervously.

"Well," the magician's normally peppy voice sounded dry until he swallowed hard. "Are you ready Arthur?"

"Ready as I'll ever be!" He quipped back anxiously.

"Well then, I'll just give you a hand into this bed of roses." Alfred's hand grasped his gloved one as he stepped into the death trap. The audience couldn't tell, but Arthur could see just how terrified the magician was.

"Ready?" Arthur took a deep breath, staring at the rusty spikes overhead.

"One…" Okay

"two…" breathe

"three!"

"Ready?" Alfred fought to keep his voice steady as he watched his best friend lie down in the medieval torture device.

"One…" Arthur closed his green eyes."

"Two…" Both of them took a steadying breath.

"Three!" With a wave of his wand he turned to face the crowd and slammed the lid shut.

Several audience members screamed, parents covered their children's eyes. Stage smile still plastered to his face, Alfred turned around to see blood leaking from the sides of the coffin.

Suddenly lightheaded, he turned back to the crowd.

Arthur told me to trust him. He thought to himself. I do trust him. He's okay.

"Are you ready to see what's inside now?" A few cheered from the stands, many just blanched at the thought.

"One!"

"Two!"

"Three!" With his heart in his throat Alfred threw open the lid to reveal a flash of red light and a dazed, but perfectly unharmed Arthur sitting inside.

How did he do that?

"You saved me!" The Brit cried, smiling up at a blushing Alfred.

Alfred lifted his assistant into his arms and carried him to the front of the ring, Arthur pressed his face into Alfred's neck, causing him to blush probably incredibly visibly in front of the crowd.

"Alfie, are you going to stare at me all night or are you going to take a bow?" The man in his arms hummed into his ear,

"Uh, right, yeah." He practically threw Arthur, who tumbled to the ground with an ungraceful thud.

The duo raised their clasped hands to the crowd and dropped into a heavy bow, racing out of the ring and into the starlight outside of the big top as Francis was announcing the closing act, the Vargas brothers on the trapeze.

"So tell me, how did you manage to get out of that box back there?"

"You got me out, Alfie, with magic, of course. I'm just the assistant." He smirked at Alfred, who furrowed his brow, racking his brain for some sort of explanation. He was just 13 when he joined the Bonnefoy Brothers' circus. Just a cute kid with nowhere left to go, he got to work selling tickets for the show, back then he couldn't even execute so much as a simple card trick. But as he grew older, it became clear that, sure, maybe he was useless at everything else he tried, but Alfred F. Jones was pure charisma. But where would he be without Arthur, ever since he arrived, a brave faced 13 year old with an untameable cowlick, there had always been watching out for him. He was only 3 years older than Alfred, but he took to the job of looking after the boy wholeheartedly, but over the past 4 years Alfred shot up like a tree, towering over a still tiny 20 year old Arthur.

But last year was when things really changed for him. There had been no magic act when Alfred arrived, a year before he joined the circus, the magicians Vladimir and Lukas were killed in an accident that still nobody liked to talk about, leaving their best friend and assistant, Arthur, sullen, angry, and unresponsive. That is, until he met Alfred. Some years later, when Alfred was 16, Francis was struggling to find a new act to keep the show from going under. Arthur encouraged Alfred to try out for the magician spot. He even offered to take up his old position as assistant, which he hadn't done since the deaths of his friends.

"But Arthur," Alfred had stuttered when he first brought it up. "I'm terrible at magic! I can't even pulling a fucking rabbit out of a hat!"

"Listen Alfie, that doesn't matter. You are the most incredible person I've ever gotten the privilege to meet. As long as you believe, they believe. And I'll be right here to help you out. Now, do you need me to tell you any more sweet nothings or are you going to get your ass out there and save this circus?"

And he was right. Here they were, one year later. It was weird, overshadowing the person he'd always looked up to. Well, onstage at least. As soon as they weren't in front of the audience, he still pushed Alfred around and ordered him about. The stars were reflected in his green eyes and the wind blew through his blonde hair, making Alfred want to run his fingers through it. But the best thing was his expression. Arthur was looking up at the sky with the calmest, most beautiful smile. God, Alfred could watch him smile forever. But then he caught Alfred's eye and dropped back to his familiar, but still adorable, scowl.

"What are you looking at, wanker?"

"Your eyebrows."

"You ungrateful brat I could kick your ass right here-"

"Um, hey, guys?"

The two sprung apart to see the lanky timid man that neither of them noticed approaching.

"Hey Matthew! Didn't see you there!" Alfred grinned.

"Typical. Anyway, Francis is about to wrap up and we need you back inside, so just, hurry along, eh?" Alfred sighed inwardly, it's not like he hated the post show because he hated meeting the audience, he'd just rather spend his time alone with Arthur.

Matthew Williams knew this. Matthew knew almost every goddamn secret told, thought, or acted upon under the tent of their red and white striped world. People, especially Alfred, told him everything because they knew there was no chance for their secret to get out. After all, who really noticed him? He figured one day Gilbert would forget he was there backed up against the board and send a knife flying into his heart.

Sometimes he wanted to be bitter but he really just couldn't.

Arthur hated when the audience came into the ring to meet the performers up close. But not for the obvious reasons of obnoxious children asking if all assistants were supposed to be pretty girls or the blatant overshadowing, or even the bloody frog Francis winking at him from across the room. Well, yes, it was probably partially Francis' fault, but mostly it was the girls coming up giggling to Alfred licking their red lips and hiding behind their curls, hoping to elicit attention from the handsome magician, who in return rewarded them with his signature smile which made the spotlights of the circus seem dim. Half charming, half crazy, and all handsome. And no matter how much it happened, how much he told himself he was just being Alfie, that these girls would never see him again, and that what he felt for Alfred was wrong in every sense, it still made Arthur feel sick to his stomach. How could he dream of being loved by someone so adored by everyone who he met. Alfred could have anyone he wanted, so why did he keep playing Arthur like that.

"Thank you ladies! But I really think you should meet my Arthur- uh my assistant Arthur." He felt Alfred's arm wrapping around his waist and pulling him to his side. Arthur's expression of surprise settled into one of fierce protectiveness, causing a lull in the girls tittering. The gap in conversation gave Francis the cue to cut things off for the night.

Alfred watched the crowd drain out the front flap of the tend, Francis kissing several hands and slapping a few asses as they left, like the big slut he is.

"What a pervert." Arthur muttered, still at Alfred's side. "Honestly, how anyone can think highly of him I have no idea that low life motherfucking..."

"Ah, mon amour, I love when you talk dirty to me."

Alfred bit back a laugh as all the color drained from his assistant's face. He didn't have the heart to tell Arthur that the frenchman was behind him the whole time. Also, imperceptible to Arthur, was Matthew, who's normally serene smile changed to something harder at Francis' words to Arthur.

"Hey guys," He tried, no one responded.

Of course, all attention was on tonight's installment of the quarrel between Arthur and Francis, which had now devolved into full on shouting. Alfred was still holding Arthur back by the waist and laughing his ass off. He almost felt bad for Matthew, who was frantically tugging at Francis' sleeve.

"I'll show you to talk about my mother that way frog!" Arthur was shouting.

"Guys, please stop fighting."

"Ah, well I would move on to insulting your father, but I doubt even your mother knows who he is."

"Oh go fuck yourself."

"Go fuck Alfred."

Both Arthur and Alfred turned bright red at this, Arthur started sputtering a response, but Alfred swore he saw trash and tickets on the floor begin to shake uncontrollably.

"Guys, please!"

"HEY! Mattie here has something to say, so why don't all of you shut up and listen to him!" Gilbert pushed his way through the crowd and looped an arm around the Canadian's shoulders.

Whatever had been compelling the objects to move had stopped, and without further explanation, Arthur ran outside.

"Arthur! Wait!" Alfred started towards the exit, but an arm held him back.

"What, Francis?"

"I think I should be the one to deal with this."

**WOW that took forever to figure out how to do. is still new to me so bear with me as i struggle through this. Here's the ****lay down. USUK, Spamano, Gerita, and Prucan is all what's going on here. I came up with the plot for this when I was singing Circus by Britney Spears in the shower I'm not gonna lie to any of you fine folks. I'll try and update every week but things will get crazy and I already have a bunch written already so it'll probably be sporadic.**

**anyway thanks for reading, any reviews are awesome, and shootout to hailsammy for beta-ing this**


	2. Chapter 2

"So then there we are, surrounded by puppies and-"

"Puppies? Feliciano they were wolves."

"Anyways, Lovino and I were surrounded by wolves and this man was holding a knife covered in blood-"

"Feli's blood."

"Singing something and drawing a star shape on the ground, he looked a little like you Ivan, and then he starts shouting really loudly in some weird language,"

"Then what?"

"I dunno! That's when I passed out!"

They were all gathered around the fire, one upping each other's stories, but Feliciano's story had them all in shocked silence, Lovino's additions only made it worse. Feliciano was smiling serenely, leaning his tiny frame against the distraught looking German strongman, who tentatively lifted the arm from around his shoulders. "Feliciano, are you _sure_ you're okay?"

Feliciano just nodded happily, the stray auburn curl bouncing up and down. "Of course Luddi, why do you ask?"

"What happened next?" Alfred asked, blue eyes glinting behind his glasses. "How did you escape?"

"Well," Lovino spoke up. "While that idiot passed out I was the one to beat up that crazy psycho with one hand while I took out the wolves with my other hand and-"

"Ahh Lovi, you're so cute I almost believe you!" Lovino was interrupted by a kind Spanish voice and a pair of strong arms wrapping around him.

"You bastard, Antonio! It's true! I did it I swear! After I killed them all I carried Feli home and I was a hero. All the girls went crazy over me!"

"Oh I bet you loved that didn't you?" Antonio teased, playing with the wild strand of the acrobat's hair.

"I bet you'd love to shove a tomato up your-"

"And didn't you pass out too, Lovi?"

Alfred drifted off from the Vargas' story of their cult kidnapping, searching the circus grounds for some sign up Arthur. At the sign of Francis he jumped up and ran over to him, searching for the familiar mop of blond hair behind him.

"Is Athur with you?" Alfred looked around, hoping to see his best friend, but Francis just shook his head.

"Is he okay?" He asked, more than a little worried. "He seemed really upset when he left, was it about me? Is he mad at me?"

Francis laughed a warm laugh. "Oh please, the man could never be mad at you, he merely went to change."

"Oh," Alfred breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. Will he be here after that then?"

"Patience, patience." Francis waved his hand vaguely. "I'm sure he can't stay away for long."

Beside Alfred, Matthew shifted his weight, the sudden movement catching Francis' attention.

"Ah, Matthieu! How happy I am to see you alive after tonight's performance."

"Bon soir Francis, ça va?"

"Tres bien, merci. Ah, j'adore quand tu te parle française, et, what is that on your cheek dear?"

"Oh, that's nothing." Matthew shifted, his straw colored hair falling to cover the healing cut on his cheek. "Gil just threw a little close tonight, that's all."

Francis' eyes turned suddenly hard. "I'll have a word with him for that, can't have him marking up your pretty face now can we?"

"If you wanna say something to me, why not just talk it out now, but Mattie here doesn't mind the cut, does he? No, in fact, I think he looks so awesome with it."

Gilbert's snow white head pushed his way through the crowd to rest on Matthew's shoulder, which was, admittedly, a bit of a reach for him.

"Guys, lets all stay calm here..." Matthew stuttered.

"Oh and i'm sure you know what's best for him, don't you?"

"Please, I know what's best for everyone!"

"Come on Matthew, let's go." Alfred made the call to grab the lanky boy's arm and led him away from the group and outside. He knew that Matthew ated confrontation in general, particularly when it involved Francis and Gilbert. They sat down on the steps to a candy blue circus wagon, far enough away from the others, but close enough for Alfred to keep an eye out for Arthur.

"I just, I'm tired of them using me. I don't think that either of them likes me, they just like to fight over me for fun. And it's not fair. I hate it, I hate that no one ever looks at me, no one gives me the time of day, no one listens to me. I'm a nobody, that's why they love to pretend to love me."

"I listen to you." Alfred chimed in through a mouthful of apple.

"At least someone does. But you're so lucky, Alfred. Everyone knows you, everyone loves you."

"I'm only in it for one person, Matthew, and you know that." Alfred shrugged off his black jacket and stared up at the trail of smoke leading to the sky.

"Oh my god you're so cheesy." He said, pushing the younger boy over.

"Hey, its true!"

He may have been inseparable from Arthur's side since his parents' car crash four years ago, but Matthew, who was only a year older than him, was the one Alfred told everything about Arthur to first.

Alfred was many things, obnoxious, delusional, sure. But he was always honest with himself, and that meant admitting that he drooled in his sleep, that he was afraid of the dark when he was alone, and that he had been in love with Arthur since he offered a hand to the thirteen year old boy collapsed in tears on the ground. It had started out as a little kid crush. Following Arthur around everywhere, blushing whenever the older boy smiled at him, gushing about him to Matthew. When he turned 14, he became more nervous around Arthur as they got closer, infatuation melting into the veins of their friendship, still painfully obvious to Alfred, but hopefully hidden from Arthur. But as the years went on he began to understand just how much Arthur meant to him, but when he got older, he realized that maybe Arthur didn't see him as the little kid he looked out for anymore, he was almost an adult now, Arthur couldn't just ignore him. And Alfred knew that he was starting to see him differently now too, he just had to make a hero's plan to win his heart.

"Hey Alfie?" Alfred nearly jumped out of his thoughts as he whirled around, the familiar nickname causing his heart to leap, but it was only Matthew.

"Don't call me that." Alfred tried to keep his tone light, but, it just felt weird for anyone but Arthur to call him that, that was just, _their _thing.

Alfred smiled. They had a thing.

"Um, sorry. But Arthur's right over there, anyways, you probably wanted to-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence. He violet eyes watched sadly as the blonde jumped up and raced past him.

"Hey Arthur! Wait up!" Arthur turned just in time to avoid a collision with the nervously grinning boy who stumbled to a stop just short of hitting him head on.

"Arthur." Alfred said breathlessly, adjusting his thick black framed glasses. His black suit jacket was open, his bow tie undone, as was the top button of his white shirt. Arthur's cheeks tinged pink, thinking back to his conversation with Francis earlier. God, what was Alfred doing approaching him after what happened in the tent. He was probably going to tell him to never speak to him again. That's what Arthur told himself, his defense of telling himself the worst possible scenario failing him when he saw the light in the boy's azure eyes and the smile directed at only him.

"Alfie?" He turned as Alfred caught his arm, pulling him close. "What is it?"

Alfred just looked so purely happy to see him, sparked out of nowhere. That's what he liked so much about the boy. Alfred's endless enthusiasm was like a spark caught on the wind, and Arthur, he was dynamite.

"I just wanted to know if you were okay, after what happened back there. Also after being alone with Francis, I was convinced one of you would end up dead."

"I'm fine, you idiot." Arthur smiled gently up at the younger boy. "Honestly, you act like you haven't seen me in ages, I've been gone only about an hour or so."

"I know, but after what Francis said, I was worried you'd be mad at me-" Alfred stopped himself, pulling his hand back, cursing inwardly. He told himself he wouldn't bring up what Francis said in the tent, because if it upset him then, it might upset him now.

But to his surprise, it was Arthur who smiled and reached out to grab Alfred's hand again, thumb tracing slow circles on the inside of his wrist, making Alfred hide a shiver, a shiver which was harder to suppress when Arthur leaned in and said "I can never be mad at you, Alfie."

Alfred smiled down into Arthur's green eyes. Why couldn't it always be this easy? What was holding him back at moments like this, little moments when Arthur let his guard down and stopped treating him like a little kid, in those moments Alfred could tell that Arthur cared, hell, more than that, he could tell that he liked him.

"Hey Arthur?" He could do it, tonight he would do it. He'd say something.

"Hm?" He'd been trying to get the courage to sweep Arthur off his feet for 2 years, there had never been anyone else. There had never been any doubt, there had only been the fear of waiting for the right time.

"Well, um, I just, I was wondering, I just felt like, you see, um, we should, "wee shouuulddd..."

"Spit it out

"Alfie spit it out!"

"I'm tired I think we should go to bed. I mean, I'm going to go to bed and I was wondering if you'd come with me. Like, in your own bed. You sleep there." God damnit, Alfred. How could he expect to be a hero if all he did was turn into a bumbling mushy mess whenever Arthur was around.

Arthur stared up at the darkness above his head, he'd always had trouble sleeping, ever since he went over the edge 5 years ago. He couldn't sleep without smelling the smoke and hearing the screams, he couldn't sleep without remembering the guilt.

That night after the show, he, Lukas, and Vladimir were just standing around in the wagon they shared, talking about the crowd that night and teasing Lukas about the tall blonde in the audience that night that he'd snuck off behind the big top with later.

"_I know his name! Of course I know his name!" Lukas protested, taking a gulp of his drink and swatting Arthur's shoulder. "It's, uh.. It was..."_

"_I told you, Lukas you aren't getting anywhere in life if all you do is hit and run. I mean, look how Arthur's turned out!" Vladimir chimed in, despite Arthur turning bright red, Lukas turned his violet eyes out the window._

"_It's not. He's different, I remember his name, it's Matthias. And I'm going to see him tomorrow."_

"_Ohhh, so you do remember!" Arthur laughed, sloshing around his contraband booze around in it's bottle, trying to remember the last guy he'd had a fling with. Honestly he didn't know. He was the cute assistant which was enough to bring in a good fuck every now and then, but other than that he'd been pretty much uninterested in anything else. after all, he was just a messed up 15 year old kid with a handful of magic and a head full of cheap alcohol on a summer night in a town he didn't know the name of. Nothing really mattered besides the now, and with the slight buzzing in his ears and a song in his head he didn't know the name of, he was loving the now._

"_Hey guys," He chimed up between Lukas and Vladimir's bickering. "I think I should tell you something."_

"_You're playing for the other team?"_

"_Francis tried to molest you again?"_

"_No no no. Um, maybe I should show you, instead."_

"_Put it away, child! You're underage!" Vladimir covered his eyes._

"_I'm probably in a relationship!" Lukas rolled backwards onto his bunk in laughter. "I might be committed! Hopefully!"_

"_And you guys say Francis is the pervert." He groaned. Somehow he wasn't nervous about this, he wasn't sure if it was the elation of the carefree night or the stolen wine from the ringleader's stash that made him foolishly brave. "But this isn't like that, I have a...talent? I guess that's what I'll call it. Just, promise not to freak out, okay?"_

_The two magicians exchanged a glance, and agreed. They didn't know what could possibly be weird about the slender British kid who they pretended to saw in half every night._

_Arthur ran his hand through his messy hair and took a deep breath, smiling slightly to himself. They were going to love this, they never saw this coming._

"_Okay, here we go." He shut his eyes and thrust his hands forward, visualizing Lukas' bottle. He visualized it rising into the air, above their heads. Judging by their shocked gasps, it had worked._

_Arthur grinned and opened his eyes, taking in his friends' slack-jawed expressions as he lifted the bottle further and upturned the contents on Lukas' platinum hair._

"_You bastard!" He exclaimed happily. "Why didn't you tell us before?"_

_Arthur laughed and gestured with his other hand to lift up his mug of tea beside him. Within a few minutes he had the air thick with objects circling above their heads._

"_Christ, Arthur! Why didn't you tell us before, you should be the show around here!" Vladimir stared up at the orbit of debris encircling them._

"_I was nervous! I'm a freak!" He said, shutting his eyes and hovering slightly above the ground._

"_This is the circus, Arthur, we're a freak show!"_

_That was the moment that changed everything. One minute they were laughing and reveling in the wonder of it, the next Arthur's life came crashing around him. The candle he hadn't noticed he picked up caught the sheet hanging off Vladimir's bunk, smouldering for a minute, before engulfing the room in flames. Instead of dropping them objects, Arthur found that in the panic, the halo of belongings began to spin faster and faster, blocking the three inside the inferno, Arthur couldn't speak, neither could his friends. They merely stared at each other as the fire began to spread to the objects spinning out of control, trapping them in a hellish prison. _

_Arthur would never forget the resigned look in Vladimir's eyes as he simply stepped back into the death surrounding them, or the tears in Lukas' eyes as he shouted over the sound of the flames for Matthias and what could have been. Arthur shut his eyes to his friends' deaths, knowing he was next._

"Arthur?" The familiar American voice shook him awake. Damn, he must have drifted off there. He should've known better than to sleep again. He shook himself awake and found himself staring up into the nervous looking blue eyes of the reason he had found hope again in the first place.

Alfred was standing nervously by the side of his bed, (shirtless, Arthur noted) shifting his weight from foot to foot.

"Yes Alfie?" Arthur mumbled sleepily, pushing back the covers. "What's wrong?"

"Well, I couldn't sleep, like, all night. Ivan told me this really scary story about ghosts and he said that there was one haunting us here and-"

"Alright, you." He groaned, rolling over. "Come on."

It wasn't an odd occurrence, but it was the first time he'd been so shaken in a few years. Arthur knew that a thirteen year old boy should face his own fears and man up, but he would confess fully to spoiling Alfred.

So even now as the broad shouldered 17 year old version of the boy he'd watched out for looked up shyly at him, Arthur couldn't turn him away.

Alfred gingerly crawled in beside Arthur, making sure to keep his distance from the older man. For maybe the first five minutes. Arthur smiled to himself as Alfred clung to his side, arms winding around his neck and hands through his hair, sighing contentedly and burying his face in Arthur's shirt.


	3. Chapter 3

**yay! after forever i'm finally back! sorry i wasn't able to update sooner, due to a broken laptop and going away over christmas break, but i promise i'll get back on track with regular updates xoxo**

Arthur was sitting on a bale of hay behind the lion's cage, staring at his shaking hands. Dear god, he was so close to losing control in there. That kind of outburst hadn't happened since... well since he met Alfred. He thought he'd finally gotten control of his powers enough to function in the magic act again over these past four years, but tonight made it clear that was not the case.

"Arthur? Mister Kirkland? Where are you?"

Oh god dammit what did he want now. He held his breath for a moment, praying Francis would just pass him by.

"Ah there you are, eyebrows!" Francis exclaimed and plopped down to sit beside Arthur on the hay.

"Get out of my face, frog." Arthur tried his best to not sound as miserable as he felt, but apparently it didn't work, because his sort-of-friend's dark blue eyes softened uncharacteristically.

"I just came here to talk, and apologise for pushing you maybe a little too far back there."

"No, it's alright. I, you may be an asshole, but I just overreacted."

"I just," Francis sighed. "Though it pains me to admit it, I am deeply sorry for telling you exactly what you want to do."

" You bastard! I do not want-he just-i-UGH." Arthur stuttered, turning bright red, the old defensiveness returning to his voice.

"Oh please, you're so obvious."

"Well then, even if I do, even if I am... you shouldn't have said it in front of him, you ruined everything!"

"Oh really? He's been pining after you since he hit puberty. The kid tells _everyone_. I'm half amused by half sick of your sexual tension. It's been years, something _has_ to give."

"Hey Francis?"

"Oui?"

"You're an ass."

"So then there we are, surrounded by puppies and-"

"Puppies? Feliciano they were wolves."

"Anyways, Lovino and I were surrounded by wolves and this man was holding a knife covered in blood-"

"Feli's blood."

"Singing something and drawing a star shape on the ground, he looked a little like you Ivan, and then he starts shouting really loudly in some weird language,"

"Then what?"

"I dunno! That's when I passed out!"

They were all gathered around the fire, one upping each other's stories, but Feliciano's story had them all in shocked silence, Lovino's additions only made it worse. Feliciano was smiling serenely, leaning his tiny frame against the distraught looking German strongman, who tentatively lifted the arm from around his shoulders. "Feliciano, are you _sure_ you're okay?"

Feliciano just nodded happily, the stray auburn curl bouncing up and down. "Of course Luddi, why do you ask?"

"What happened next?" Alfred asked, blue eyes glinting behind his glasses. "How did you escape?"

"Well," Lovino spoke up. "While that idiot passed out I was the one to beat up that crazy psycho with one hand while I took out the wolves with my other hand and-"

"Ahh Lovi, you're so cute I almost believe you!" Lovino was interrupted by a kind Spanish voice and a pair of strong arms wrapping around him.

"You bastard, Antonio! It's true! I did it I swear! After I killed them all I carried Feli home and I was a hero. All the girls went crazy over me!"

"Oh I bet you loved that didn't you?" Antonio teased, playing with the wild strand of the acrobat's hair.

"I bet you'd love to shove a tomato up your-"

"And didn't you pass out too, Lovi?"

Alfred drifted off from the Vargas' story of their cult kidnapping, searching the circus grounds for some sign up Arthur. At the sign of Francis he jumped up and ran over to him, searching for the familiar mop of blond hair behind him.

"Is Athur with you?" Alfred looked around, hoping to see his best friend, but Francis just shook his head.

"Is he okay?" He asked, more than a little worried. "He seemed really upset when he left, was it about me? Is he mad at me?"

Francis laughed a warm laugh. "Oh please, the man could never be mad at you, he merely went to change."

"Oh," Alfred breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. Will he be here after that then?"

"Patience, patience." Francis waved his hand vaguely. "I'm sure he can't stay away for long."

Beside Alfred, Matthew shifted his weight, the sudden movement catching Francis' attention.

"Ah, Matthieu! How happy I am to see you alive after tonight's performance."

"Bon soir Francis, ça va?"

"Tres bien, merci. Ah, j'adore quand tu te parle française, et, what is that on your cheek dear?"

"Oh, that's nothing." Matthew shifted, his straw colored hair falling to cover the healing cut on his cheek. "Gil just threw a little close tonight, that's all."

Francis' eyes turned suddenly hard. "I'll have a word with him for that, can't have him marking up your pretty face now can we?"

"If you wanna say something to me, why not just talk it out now, but Mattie here doesn't mind the cut, does he? No, in fact, I think he looks so awesome with it."

Gilbert's snow white head pushed his way through the crowd to rest on Matthew's shoulder, which was, admittedly, a bit of a reach for him.

"Guys, lets all stay calm here..." Matthew stuttered.

"Oh and i'm sure you know what's best for him, don't you?"

"Please, I know what's best for everyone!"

"Come on Matthew, let's go." Alfred made the call to grab the lanky boy's arm and led him away from the group and outside. He knew that Matthew ated confrontation in general, particularly when it involved Francis and Gilbert. They sat down on the steps to a candy blue circus wagon, far enough away from the others, but close enough for Alfred to keep an eye out for Arthur.

"I just, I'm tired of them using me. I don't think that either of them likes me, they just like to fight over me for fun. And it's not fair. I hate it, I hate that no one ever looks at me, no one gives me the time of day, no one listens to me. I'm a nobody, that's why they love to pretend to love me."

"I listen to you." Alfred chimed in through a mouthful of apple.

"At least someone does. But you're so lucky, Alfred. Everyone knows you, everyone loves you."

"I'm only in it for one person, Matthew, and you know that." Alfred shrugged off his black jacket and stared up at the trail of smoke leading to the sky.

"Oh my god you're so cheesy." He said, pushing the younger boy over.

"Hey, its true!"

He may have been inseparable from Arthur's side since his parents' car crash four years ago, but Matthew, who was only a year older than him, was the one Alfred told everything about Arthur to first.

Alfred was many things, obnoxious, delusional, sure. But he was always honest with himself, and that meant admitting that he drooled in his sleep, that he was afraid of the dark when he was alone, and that he had been in love with Arthur since he offered a hand to the thirteen year old boy collapsed in tears on the ground. It had started out as a little kid crush. Following Arthur around everywhere, blushing whenever the older boy smiled at him, gushing about him to Matthew. When he turned 14, he became more nervous around Arthur as they got closer, infatuation melting into the veins of their friendship, still painfully obvious to Alfred, but hopefully hidden from Arthur. But as the years went on he began to understand just how much Arthur meant to him, but when he got older, he realized that maybe Arthur didn't see him as the little kid he looked out for anymore, he was almost an adult now, Arthur couldn't just ignore him. And Alfred knew that he was starting to see him differently now too, he just had to make a hero's plan to win his heart.

"Hey Alfie?" Alfred nearly jumped out of his thoughts as he whirled around, the familiar nickname causing his heart to leap, but it was only Matthew.

"Don't call me that." Alfred tried to keep his tone light, but, it just felt weird for anyone but Arthur to call him that, that was just, _their _thing.

Alfred smiled. They had a thing.

"Um, sorry. But Arthur's right over there, anyways, you probably wanted to-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence. He violet eyes watched sadly as the blonde jumped up and raced past him.

"Hey Arthur! Wait up!" Arthur turned just in time to avoid a collision with the nervously grinning boy who stumbled to a stop just short of hitting him head on.

"Arthur." Alfred said breathlessly, adjusting his thick black framed glasses. His black suit jacket was open, his bow tie undone, as was the top button of his white shirt. Arthur's cheeks tinged pink, thinking back to his conversation with Francis earlier. God, what was Alfred doing approaching him after what happened in the tent. He was probably going to tell him to never speak to him again. That's what Arthur told himself, his defense of telling himself the worst possible scenario failing him when he saw the light in the boy's azure eyes and the smile directed at only him.

"Alfie?" He turned as Alfred caught his arm, pulling him close. "What is it?"

Alfred just looked so purely happy to see him, sparked out of nowhere. That's what he liked so much about the boy. Alfred's endless enthusiasm was like a spark caught on the wind, and Arthur, he was dynamite.

"I just wanted to know if you were okay, after what happened back there. Also after being alone with Francis, I was convinced one of you would end up dead."

"I'm fine, you idiot." Arthur smiled gently up at the younger boy. "Honestly, you act like you haven't seen me in ages, I've been gone only about an hour or so."

"I know, but after what Francis said, I was worried you'd be mad at me-" Alfred stopped himself, pulling his hand back, cursing inwardly. He told himself he wouldn't bring up what Francis said in the tent, because if it upset him then, it might upset him now.

But to his surprise, it was Arthur who smiled and reached out to grab Alfred's hand again, thumb tracing slow circles on the inside of his wrist, making Alfred hide a shiver, a shiver which was harder to suppress when Arthur leaned in and said "I can never be mad at you, Alfie."

Alfred smiled down into Arthur's green eyes. Why couldn't it always be this easy? What was holding him back at moments like this, little moments when Arthur let his guard down and stopped treating him like a little kid, in those moments Alfred could tell that Arthur cared, hell, more than that, he could tell that he liked him.

"Hey Arthur?" He could do it, tonight he would do it. He'd say something.

"Hm?" He'd been trying to get the courage to sweep Arthur off his feet for 2 years, there had never been anyone else. There had never been any doubt, there had only been the fear of waiting for the right time.

"Well, um, I just, I was wondering, I just felt like, you see, um, we should, "wee shouuulddd..."

"Spit it out

"Alfie spit it out!"

"I'm tired I think we should go to bed. I mean, I'm going to go to bed and I was wondering if you'd come with me. Like, in your own bed. You sleep there." God damnit, Alfred. How could he expect to be a hero if all he did was turn into a bumbling mushy mess whenever Arthur was around.

Arthur stared up at the darkness above his head, he'd always had trouble sleeping, ever since he went over the edge 5 years ago. He couldn't sleep without smelling the smoke and hearing the screams, he couldn't sleep without remembering the guilt.

That night after the show, he, Lukas, and Vladimir were just standing around in the wagon they shared, talking about the crowd that night and teasing Lukas about the tall blonde in the audience that night that he'd snuck off behind the big top with later.

"_I know his name! Of course I know his name!" Lukas protested, taking a gulp of his drink and swatting Arthur's shoulder. "It's, uh.. It was..."_

"_I told you, Lukas you aren't getting anywhere in life if all you do is hit and run. I mean, look how Arthur's turned out!" Vladimir chimed in, despite Arthur turning bright red, Lukas turned his violet eyes out the window._

"_It's not. He's different, I remember his name, it's Matthias. And I'm going to see him tomorrow."_

"_Ohhh, so you do remember!" Arthur laughed, sloshing around his contraband booze around in it's bottle, trying to remember the last guy he'd had a fling with. Honestly he didn't know. He was the cute assistant which was enough to bring in a good fuck every now and then, but other than that he'd been pretty much uninterested in anything else. after all, he was just a messed up 15 year old kid with a handful of magic and a head full of cheap alcohol on a summer night in a town he didn't know the name of. Nothing really mattered besides the now, and with the slight buzzing in his ears and a song in his head he didn't know the name of, he was loving the now._

"_Hey guys," He chimed up between Lukas and Vladimir's bickering. "I think I should tell you something."_

"_You're playing for the other team?"_

"_Francis tried to molest you again?"_

"_No no no. Um, maybe I should show you, instead."_

"_Put it away, child! You're underage!" Vladimir covered his eyes._

"_I'm probably in a relationship!" Lukas rolled backwards onto his bunk in laughter. "I might be committed! Hopefully!"_

"_And you guys say Francis is the pervert." He groaned. Somehow he wasn't nervous about this, he wasn't sure if it was the elation of the carefree night or the stolen wine from the ringleader's stash that made him foolishly brave. "But this isn't like that, I have a...talent? I guess that's what I'll call it. Just, promise not to freak out, okay?"_

_The two magicians exchanged a glance, and agreed. They didn't know what could possibly be weird about the slender British kid who they pretended to saw in half every night._

_Arthur ran his hand through his messy hair and took a deep breath, smiling slightly to himself. They were going to love this, they never saw this coming._

"_Okay, here we go." He shut his eyes and thrust his hands forward, visualizing Lukas' bottle. He visualized it rising into the air, above their heads. Judging by their shocked gasps, it had worked._

_Arthur grinned and opened his eyes, taking in his friends' slack-jawed expressions as he lifted the bottle further and upturned the contents on Lukas' platinum hair._

"_You bastard!" He exclaimed happily. "Why didn't you tell us before?"_

_Arthur laughed and gestured with his other hand to lift up his mug of tea beside him. Within a few minutes he had the air thick with objects circling above their heads._

"_Christ, Arthur! Why didn't you tell us before, you should be the show around here!" Vladimir stared up at the orbit of debris encircling them._

"_I was nervous! I'm a freak!" He said, shutting his eyes and hovering slightly above the ground._

"_This is the circus, Arthur, we're a freak show!"_

_That was the moment that changed everything. One minute they were laughing and reveling in the wonder of it, the next Arthur's life came crashing around him. The candle he hadn't noticed he picked up caught the sheet hanging off Vladimir's bunk, smouldering for a minute, before engulfing the room in flames. Instead of dropping them objects, Arthur found that in the panic, the halo of belongings began to spin faster and faster, blocking the three inside the inferno, Arthur couldn't speak, neither could his friends. They merely stared at each other as the fire began to spread to the objects spinning out of control, trapping them in a hellish prison. _

_Arthur would never forget the resigned look in Vladimir's eyes as he simply stepped back into the death surrounding them, or the tears in Lukas' eyes as he shouted over the sound of the flames for Matthias and what could have been. Arthur shut his eyes to his friends' deaths, knowing he was next._

"Arthur?" The familiar American voice shook him awake. Damn, he must have drifted off there. He should've known better than to sleep again. He shook himself awake and found himself staring up into the nervous looking blue eyes of the reason he had found hope again in the first place.

Alfred was standing nervously by the side of his bed, (shirtless, Arthur noted) shifting his weight from foot to foot.

"Yes Alfie?" Arthur mumbled sleepily, pushing back the covers. "What's wrong?"

"Well, I couldn't sleep, like, all night. Ivan told me this really scary story about ghosts and he said that there was one haunting us here and-"

"Alright, you." He groaned, rolling over. "Come on."

It wasn't an odd occurrence, but it was the first time he'd been so shaken in a few years. Arthur knew that a thirteen year old boy should face his own fears and man up, but he would confess fully to spoiling Alfred.

So even now as the broad shouldered 17 year old version of the boy he'd watched out for looked up shyly at him, Arthur couldn't turn him away.

Alfred gingerly crawled in beside Arthur, making sure to keep his distance from the older man. For maybe the first five minutes. Arthur smiled to himself as Alfred clung to his side, arms winding around his neck and hands through his hair, sighing contentedly and burying his face in Arthur's shirt.

Arthur was always so warm, Alfred thought to himself as he listened to the man's heartbeat. He wanted to stay like this, when he was with Arthur, there was nothing scary. When he was with Arthur it felt like home, and it had as soon as he met him, he knew that was where he belonged.

"Goodnight Alfie." Arthur murmured softly and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

**wHOA THE FONT CHANGES is weird I'm still getting used to it…i have to ****_add my own author's notes!_**

**as always thanks to hailsammy for being the best beta reader and number one fan, y'all should hit up her stories**

**and if ya want you can find me on tumblr alfredojones**


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